Lose The Weight You Want Forever
Why is losing weight
so difficult? The answer is relatively simple for those of us who have added
some extra weightwe need to eat less and exercise more. So, why do we
continually find ourselves in the same place year after year with carrying
around more weight than we want to?
The
problem is that there are many nonconscious issues that often sabotage our
best-laid plans. This article will help you understand some of what may be
preventing you from making the forward progress that you want.
Preliminary Steps
One
of the first things to look at is your need strength profile. This is a
self-assessment that determines which of a persons five basic needs drives the
majority of that persons behavior. All of us have the same five basic needs but
freedom may be my highest need, while love & belonging may be yours and
survival may be someone elses. The other two needs are power and fun. These all
play a huge role in why we do the things we do in the way we do them.
Next
it is important to seriously consider all the things you want in your life, not
just your weight loss goals but the whole of everything you want to do, have
and experience in your life. Ask yourself the question, “What do I want? If I
could have anything, what would it be? What do I really, truly want?”
After
that, you want to narrow down what you want to a complete vision of how things
will change for you after losing the weight you want to lose. What will you
have that you dont have now? What will you do differently? How will you be
different? You must be able to clearly see the finished version of what you are
attempting to accomplish with all its accompanying perks. This will become your
own personal mental movie or daydream of how you want your life to be after
accomplishing your weight loss goals. You will begin to visualize your success
at least once a day.
The
next step is to record all the things you do that both help or hinder your
progress toward your weight loss plan. So, for example, if you were able to
resist donuts for breakfast, write that down. If you ordered dessert after a
meal at a restaurant, record that as well. In addition to the actual behaviors,
you also must write down the thoughts and feelings you experience that either
help or hinder your progress, too.
So,
if you think to yourself, Its OK if I have this piece of chocolate. I was
really good yesterdaywrite that down. Then, if you have the thought, Nothing
tastes as good as thin feelswrite that down too. If youre feeling bored and you
grab a bag of potato chips, record the boredom feeling. If you feel elated when
you skip a favorite dessert, write that down also. Keep track of everything you
do, think and feel that either helps or impedes your progress toward your
weight loss goals.
The
next step is to critically evaluate the things you are doing, thinking and
feeling and ask yourself the difficult questionIf I keep doing everything the
way Ive been doing it, will I end up with what I REALLY want? Will I accomplish
the vision I have of my new life that I created in my mental movie?
If
your answer is yes, then great! You probably dont even need to continue reading
this article. Just keep doing what you are doing and you will get there.
However, if your answer is no, then read on.
If
your answer is no, then hopefully you have been successful in creating some
cognitive dissonance for yourself. This is an uncomfortable feeling that
provides you with information that you need to make some changes. Without
experiencing this cognitive dissonance, its easy to continue with the bad
habits we have developed over time. People generally dont implement changes in
their lives unless they are in some serious pain.
If
youre not moving forward toward your goal, the first thing you need to examine
is: Do you have a burning desire to accomplish your goal? Whatever your weight
and fitness goal is, you must have a burning desire to accomplish it.
Another
possibility is that up until now you havent had a very good plan about how to
go about losing weight. Without a solid plan, there will easily be loopholes allowing
you to sabotage your success. Willpower alone only takes us so far when we are
fighting our brains conditioning.
A
third possibility is that you want something else that is competing with your
weight loss plan. There are many possibilities to consider but you will find
some clues, either hidden or obvious, in the list of your behaviors, thought
and emotions that you previously developed. What do you do, think and feel
instead of the things that will ensure your success with your weight loss plan?
An excellent question to ask yourself is: What would you have to give up to
become successful with your weight loss goals?
Once
you become conscious of the other things you want in addition to losing weight,
you have some decisions to make. Is the thing you want something you want more
than losing weight? If it is, then you can decide to give up on the idea of
losing weight and simply be content doing, having or obtaining the other thing
you want. You will then have a new goal toward which to work.
Another
option is to consciously decide that you want to lose weight more than anything
else. If that occurs, then you must specifically target your personal areas of
temptation in your neural reconditioning program, which I will explain later.
Finally,
the last option involves figuring out some kind of compromise so that you can
have some of each of the things you want. For example, I just read in a
magazine of a movie star who restricts her carbohydrate intake six days a week
but then she allows herself as much pizza as she wants on Sundays. Thats a
workable compromise.
The
final question to ask yourself is: Am I willing to do the necessary work to
make my plan come to fruition?
Developing your Plan
There
are several things to take into account when making a plan. You must consider
your most important needs and be sure to build in way to meet those needs while
still losing weight. If your biggest need is love & belonging, then you may
want a partner to work with you. If survival is your biggest need, then you will
need to build in a way for you to feel safe.
If
power is your highest need, then what you want to think about is perhaps making
your weight loss a competition somehow. If your highest need is freedom, then
you must begin to think about things, people, activities or places that allow
you to feel free that wont impede your weight loss progress and add them to
your weight loss plan. If your highest need is fun, then you must find a way to
make your weight loss fun for you.
The
next step is to develop positive affirmations that support your weight loss
goals. You must begin to reprogram the negative thoughts that are standing in
the way of you accomplishing your goals. Oftentimes, these thoughts are even
out of your conscious awareness but they prevent your success nonetheless.
Affirmations
are positive, present, time sensitive statements affirming what you want to be
true. Research shows that our brains do not know the difference between the
truth and a lie. When you affirm a particular thought, value or belief in your
mind frequently enough over a long enough period of time, your brain will begin
to believe it. Consequently, the brain will mobilize its strong forces to do
whatever it takes to manifest the thing you are claiming to be true in your
life.
Write
out as many affirmations as you want to support your goals. You may have
affirmations about food, exercise, thoughts and anything else that will help
you move in the direction of accomplishing your goals. There is no limit to how
long your list of affirmations can be. You decide how much time you want to
spend with them each day, with five minutes twice daily being the minimum. You
should recite your affirmations once upon first waking up and then at the end
of the day just before going to sleep.
It
is helpful to look yourself in the eyes while saying your affirmation. You can
do this, of course, with the use of a mirror. Look yourself in the eyes, as
though daring the person in the mirror to dispute the truth of what you are
saying. Repeat your affirmations with passion and conviction twice daily. If
you can fit them in a third time around lunch, even better.
Next,
you want to spend some time analyzing your food triggersthose things that
prompt you to eat the wrong foods and to eat when you are not hungry.
Many
people have substituted food to meet their needs in an unhealthy way. We eat
when we are depressed, excited, stressed, bored, angry, or scared. Different
people for a variety of reasons use emotions as triggers to eat. And its not as
if we are diving into the refrigerator to pull out an apple or some carrots!
No! We are reaching for the chocolate or the potato chips. And no, these are
not in the 5th food group!
Emotions
are only one thing that we use for a food trigger. Sometimes we eat to be
social. Sometimes we eat because the food is free. Sometimes we eat because we
are experiencing a particular craving. Sometimes we eat for comfort. Sometimes
we eat because the clock tells us its time to do so.
Other
times, we will eat when we are not hungry because we paid for the meal. We were
told we must clean our plate and not waste food. We tell ourselves we dont like
leftovers so we better eat it up or maybe there isnt enough to save and we dont
want to throw good food away.
In
order to be successful with your new weight loss agenda, you must begin to
think of food differently. No longer is food your best friend or the thing you
reach for to comfort you. Food is simply fuel for your body. The only time to
eat is when your body signals you that it is hungry and then you must be
conscious of the food for which you reach.
Get
conscious about the things you are doing as they pertain to weight loss. Paying
attention and noting the events and circumstances that trigger your eating will
provide you with a lot of information about what to do to fix things.
After
analyzing your food triggers, it is appropriate to again ask the question, What
would you have to give up to accomplish the weight loss goals youve set? You
may have uncovered new information to consider.
If
youve come this far, its time to construct your plan. First of all, this plan
must be written. You are going to write yourself a contract! The first two
items are your plan will include daily visualization of your new life and the
recitation of your affirmations.
Include
ways to get your primary needs met that wont sabotage your weight loss efforts.
Include elements of past successes that will add to your likelihood of success.
Include efforts to do something different when you experience your strong food
triggers. Be proactive about what you will do instead. Dont simply write, I
will not eat when I am depressed. Write what you will do instead.
When
you are satisfied with the potential success of your plan, sign and date it.
Then follow the plan you’ve made with dogged determination.

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